Hurt By The Arrow

Today's the last day of my week-long block leave. It has been just wonderful not wearing the no. 4 uniform or PT Kit with 'ARMY' emblazoned across your t-shirt. It is simply relaxing and happy to be out and about doing my own stuff again. I'm not saying army is bad, hey, I've got good friends who are regulars, and to a certain extent you are well taken care of inside, but I'm just not someone who is, and will probably never be used to a regimental lifestyle, being told every hour of the day what to do.

I've been very tolerant and putting up with sh*t from some people and yesterday, 7 July marks my one year in national service. I had a plan of what to do for the whole week of my block leave, but sad to say, some things didn't turn out as expected, some unexpected things happened and everything has been topsy-turvy. Suddenly I am home on a Sunday afternoon at 1.30pm, alone with no one to talk to, no one to have lunch with, just no one.

I dunno how things became like that, but it has already happened. I tried going back to my old sunday routine, playing football in the late afternoon, but so many thoughts just filled my mind that I wasn't interested in kicking any ball, though there was one bugger who was very interested at kicking my feet throughout the whole game.

I feel like I'm losing interest in everything, losing my sense of purpose and direction. What do I do? I miss you...